Tuesday, February 19, 2008

I am having a hard time lately getting my practice time in. I used to use LOST episodes on abc.com as a carrot to get me to play scales at least, but now that I've finished all of them; my retinas feel permanently burned from staring at my laptop screen, and when I do watch and play I get annoyed that I can't concentrate properly on the guitar...although that doesn't seem to be enough to get myself to shut it off. I love the idea of practicing for many hours, but without a lesson or recital to prepare myself, I can't seem to do it consistently. I realize that this period after the DMA debacle is crucial to my future musicianship, that I need to get back on the horse and create good musical opportunities for myself that will heal me from my humiliation, but just I can't do it. My man-friend is perfectly happy descending into his lair in the basement and playing Bach and Beethoven for many hours, but I am more motivated to clean the bathroom. I am becoming a a suburban housewife...

Saturday, February 16, 2008

I am utterly exhausted...Saturdays have turned into a marathon of early-childhood music classes (5 in a row from 9:00 AM to 12:30) then teaching at the Music & Arts down the street for from 1:00 until 5:00. Of course it didn't help that I alone enjoyed most of our bottle of wine from our Valentine celebration last night; but I hope my stamina for baby-dancing increases, I have come to the realization that what was once a temporary gig has now turned into an actual component of my career. And I think that is actually ok.

P.S. Isn't my picture in this posting creepy?

Friday, February 15, 2008

Tonight is the belated celebration of Valentines day for AJS and I. Yesterday was festive too of course, with some beautiful roses and the owl bar V-day celebration; but we weren't truly going to celebrate it as I had to work all night. So instead we are going the the Chameleon Cafe tonight; a low-key gourmet establishment in our neighborhood with a great kitchen and rather eclectic interior decorating. Andrew and I got out of bed much earlier than I wanted to to get in an hour of racquetball, as I need all the Activity Points I can get to prepare for tonight's dinner. I plan to wear a dress and have a fabulous time :).

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

This is my Carefirst BlueCross BlueShield identification card. It has taken 165 days, two visits to the doctor, 15 hours on the phone, 3 conversations that made me cry, and the acceptance of the fact that no thyroid-related conditions will be covered for another ten months to obtain this card. My battle to be protected from bankruptcy if I get hit by a car was won; and the victory was a quiet arrival of a slim envelope containing this precious card. I feel relief and exasperation.

Monday, February 11, 2008

What began my terrible mood this morning is still a mystery. I got furious at my helpless dog when she wouldn't heel on her walk, I had a meltdown when my computer went gray and wouldn't restart (its fine now), and am still angrily contemplating several life and career choices. I attempted to channel my rage into cleaning the downstairs; whether it was because of the soothing sounds of "the count of monte cristo" on audiobook, or my shiny and vaccuumed floors, or the fact that I got to record my weight loss again this week (13.5 pounds gone!), I feel slightly better. I will return from my long, and rather futile trip to annapolis and play a 9 pm game of racquetball with my man-friend. Physical activity will both allow me to sleep well and relax, and perhaps AJS and I will enjoy some tree hugging food and drink at One World.

Monday, February 04, 2008

I am better at racquetball than you

actually, that's a lie. But, tonight the tables ALMOST turned for me in my battle to win a racquetball game against my man-friend. I had the lead for most of the game, and the end score was 18 -21. So close...I believe that if I was in better shape I would have had more energy to pull through the end. He was scared though, I could tell.
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